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What it means to say "I Do"... When two people marry they vow to spend the
rest of their lives with each other...
It's a declaration on their part that there is only one person that they want to spend their
lives with whether "in sickness or in health, in good times and bad, forever and ever".
The fact that making their marriage work will require a considerable degree of effort
doesn't even enter most couples minds at this time.
What is the average length of a marriage?
It's quite sad that many couples are just not prepared to spend the effort in making their
marriage work... In many western countries over 45% of all first marriages end in divorce within five years from
the time the couples take their vows.
For more information on this important topic check out our article
on stopping divorce.
Staying together in good times is easy, but in times when married relationships become strained
many people take ending it as the easiest option.
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"We marry the person we love ... we must then
learn to love the person we marry".
-Anon
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To assist those readers who feel that they have come to the end of the road and
desperately need marriage support, we have included a review on this site of the best marriage guides currently
available.
Making your marriage work - some basic tips.
With a little work and care, you can save your marriage and restore your relationship. There is a very basic
three step process to making a marriage work and to bring back the good times:
First - Decide that
making your marriage work is something that you really desperately want.
This may sound very simple however it is probably the hardest step of all. It’s easy to say you
want to save your marriage... but as we all know that doesn’t necessarily mean it is going to happen. As with all
goals in life when you decide that making your marriage work is what you really want then you need to make this
your number one focus.
Your purpose in life needs to become focused on this one goal - that of saving your marriage. Even if it means making major adjustments to work habits, changing
jobs, adjusting your family and social life... if it means not catching up with friends then you don’t catch up
with friends.
Nothing should be more important than your marriage.
With everything you are doing you should be asking “will this help me realise my goal of
making my marriage work"? The answer should always be yes.
Second - Figure out what is wrong.
Again, this is not as easy as it sounds. More often than not the things that trigger arguments
aren’t the underlying problems in a marriage... it's these problems that you need to uncover. Sit down with your
partner and acknowledge that things are not working as they should... be honest and open about how you are both
feeling in the relationship.
Open this conversation by asking “How can I make you happier”?
A man’s first natural response to that is probably going to be sexual. Please don’t assume he is joking or being
crude. Very often a man needs a strong physical component in a relationship, so take the response on board. Then
say “Okay, what else”?
Third - FIX IT.
Once a marital problem is acknowledged and defined, it becomes so much easier to actually see
what the steps are to making marriage work again.
The problem almost always contains the solution. If the problem is... “I don’t feel I have
enough time with you” then the solution has already presented itself. Likewise if it's... “I don’t have enough time
to myself” you can move the other way.
The key is to identify the real problems and have an honest shot at fixing them.
Successful marriages don't just happen they take constant effort, compromise, communication, sharing and love on the part
of both spouses.
So there you have the tips to marriage care and making a marriage work. It may sound really
simple but believe us these are easy first step strategies that you can employ to help save your marriage.
Fighting for your marriage rather than fighting in your
marriage.
If you are really serious about making your marriage work you can be on your way to repairing
your relationship within minutes. Counselors Amy Waterman and Andrew Rusbatch are the authors of the best selling
"Save My Marriage Today" guide.
This is a comprehensive guide to saving your marriage... even if your partner doesn't want to work on
it.
This guide is full of easily implemented and practical ways to ensure that stability and love
are returned to your relationship.
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