Saving Your Marriage  

You can save your marriage.
The difficulties encountered in saving a marriage is a challenge that couples throughout history have agonized over ... Many of the problems that arise in troublesome marriages including communication breakdowns, tension and anxiety, lack of trust, infidelity and other serious issues can be worked through and love and intimacy restored in a relationship.

Our names are Brad and Michelle Ritchie. We are a married couple and have been in practice together as relationship counselors since 1988.

This site has been set up after many requests from people who need help in healing their dysfunctional marriages and are keen to learn about implementing practical techniques that will assist in saving their marriage and restoring their previous loving relationship.

In addition to the numerous informative articles, we have included recommendations for further study such as a FREE 6 part mini course (full details at the bottom of this page) and reviews of the 5 best online marriage guides currently available.

All of this information is designed to provide help to people who are struggling in their marriages and to assist them to make their relationship happier, stronger and more loving.

Restoring your relationship.

The many articles on this website provide practical advice and recommended solutions for some of the common relationship problems that many married couples (and perhaps you) are experiencing.

This information is provided in the hope that it will give you the means to saving your marriage and restoring love, trust and stability to your relationship.

You obviously loved your spouse before your marriage and more than likely that love is still there sulking somewhere beneath the pain. With determination, willingness and the right mindset you will be able to resurrect your previous loving relationship.

On the left of this page you will a list of the topics that are covered to date. In these you will find a range of advice on the most common marital problems that counselors come across in their practices. Hopefully your particular problem is touched on here and will provide the necessary help to save your marriage.

Marriage self help - be careful.

One of the major problems in dysfunctional marriages is well meaning parents, workmates or relatives giving relationship advice. In many cases this advice is not entirely unbiased and can often make a bad situation worse, even to the point of destroying trust within an immediate or extended family unit.

It cannot be emphasized enough, always seek independent marital advice if you and your partner genuinely want to settle any kind of marriage crisis that you are unable to settle yourselves.

If at all possible don't even discuss your marriage problems with family members, it can be very upsetting for parents (particularly elderly ones) to learn that their adult child's marriage is in trouble.

Most married couples suffering major problems in their relationship are unable to sort out their dificulties on their own and need independent professional help to do so.

Don’t wait too long to seek professional help. The longer you wait the more serious the problems can become.

The younger you are the more likely you are to be successful in resolving your difficulties. Older couples in long term marriages are often too set in their ways to be flexible.

Seek help while you’re still in love and open to change.

What defines a successful marriage?

What’s positive and blissful for one marriage may be torment and unhappiness for another. Look around at your parents’ and your friends, do they appear happy to you? Would you settle for a marriage like theirs?

Most marriages will eventually experience disappointments, set-backs and sometimes even failure. It’s up to you and your partner to confront these problems head-on and resolve them together.

No matter what problems occur in your marriage be willing to resolve them. There is no setback you can’t recover from if you are prepared to confront your marital predicaments together.

Cope with challenges as they occur and rest assured in the knowledge that your marriage will grow stronger.

Love is the foundation of all marriages but understanding, acceptance and effective communication are also unavoidable qualities in a successful marriage.

Make a determined effort to meet each other’s needs both emotional and physical. Treat your spouse as a friend as well as a lover and provider. Appreciate and respect each other and you’ll find it that much easier to cope with trivial annoyances.

Seek and maintain a good balance of leisure, work and pleasure. Set shared goals and encourage each other to work toward them. Dream and plan together and strive to make those dreams and plans come true.

When a decision has to be made, make it together. Value and respect each other’s opinion and advice even when you don't agree with it.

Laugh with your spouse and not at your spouse. A sense of humor is a must if your marriage is to survive the pitfalls and setbacks that all marriages endure from time to time.

The ingredients of a successful marriage are like the ingredients of a good recipe. Once you’ve found the right recipe … savor it.

Unhappy marriages - there is hope.

It is useful to realize that unhappy periods in married relationships are not always an indication of future unhappiness.

Many studies have been carried out on married couples who at a certain point in time would be termed unhappy for one reason or another, then within five years the vast majority, 86% in one study, were found to be either happy or very happy in their relationship.

Our own statistics back this up. The majority of cases that we have dealt with over the past 20 plus years have had a positive outcome.

A recent survey that our practice carried out confirmed that just on 83% of our clients were still living together in a happy or very happy marital relationship for at least 5 years after their last consultation. The remaining 17% had divorced, separated or died.

The road you travel to saving your marriage may not be as difficult as you may imagine it to be ... very few marital problems cannot be resolved if both parties are willing to give it ago, be open in their relationship, and above all spend time communicating and being honest with each other.

Forget their wrong doings and their faults, love them and forgive.

Remember this, a small positive change in your attitude and approach towards your partner can have a lasting therapeutic effect on your marital relationship.

Help for your problem marriage.

Our long term goal is to provide as much useful and detailed information as we possibly can in an effort to help couples with marital problems. To this end we will be constantly refreshing this website with additional articles.

If you click on the  symbol at the top of this page, and then click subscribe, you will automatically receive new articles as they are added to this site.

In an endeavor to assist couples further, we recently purchased and reviewed 20 of the currently available "downloadable" marriage guidance courses. From those we selected the five that we considered to be the most effective and which provided the best value for money.

If you are in a really desperate situation and want to sort out your marital strife urgently then take a look at our recommendations. There will be one there that will fit your requirements and give you the knowledge and skill to save your marriage and transform your relationship for the better.

Click Here: Best Marriage Guides Reviewed

Brad & Michelle